“This is the highest wisdom that I own; freedom and life are earned by those alone who conquer them each day anew”
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
If I told you:
I could place among the Top 10 Finalists in one National Screenwriting competition
then enter the same competition the next year with a different script,
and not even place at all,
while simultaneously being a Quarter Finalist in the Nicholls Screenwriting Fellowship
(1 of approximately 350 scripts out of 6700 to get through)
What would you say?
In all reality, there's really nothing to say. At least nothing I haven't already said to myself, over either a stiff drink or in a fit of tears. Screenwriting, like a lot of art, is subjective as fuck. It just is. It'll never change. The sun will set, the wind will whistle through the trees, and some dumb idiot will give the go ahead to Final Destination 5 or The Fast and Furious 6940 and they will both make money while a multitude of challenging, unique scripts gather dust underneath people's couches.
Good movies are made every day.
But so are bad movies.
But so are bad movies.
Perhaps the reason I've been able to stop myself from yanking out all my hair and slamming my bald head into a wall is that I have learned to not let this career choice define me. I have other interests, other things that fill me with happiness, a semi-grounded sense of self and a keen eye for certain undeniable facts of life. The business of Screenwriting, of Hollywood, is always going to be odd and just a little bit unbelievable. Persistence, luck and connections are always going to be the way in, and talent will forever be susceptible to someone else's judgment.
At a certain point, I have to be okay with what I've knowingly tangled myself up in.
I don't have to bow down to it, but I do have to accept the rules of the game.
I don't have to bow down to it, but I do have to accept the rules of the game.
Screenwriting is a big part of my life,
but it's not everything.
And so I'm teaching myself to laugh and shake my head, instead of punch a wall and nurse a desire to kill. It's not always easy, but no one's died yet, so I guess I'm getting somewhere.
15 comments:
I'm sorry your frustrated. It sounds stressful. But honestly, don't trust those competitions. I've spent the past ten years entering creative writing contests. Sometimes I win. Sometimes I don't. And it's sometimes disgusting to see that the winner's story is so pathetic in comparison. It can bring you down.
You're a great writer. I've read some of your work. I believe you published an excerpt here a long time ago.
People who love what they do and are good at it most often don't win those things. And the people who do win often don't really go on to have huge careers in the business. Just sayin.
Love you.
Just keep writing and pursuing other goals and don't let criticisms or naysayers get you down. You're obviously doing something right, and just in this blog post I can tell that you're an excellent writer :)
I like the mindless comedy or action movie every now and then but why must majority of films be recycled ideas? Why any film needs five versions of it is beyond me. Anyways keep it up, its good you don't let it get under your skin too much.
Definitely don't punch the wall. That'll break your hand, and then you won't be able to blog. And that will depress me.
It must be very difficult for you. I too find the subjective nature of writing a bit of a challenge, but as I'm writing and trying to publish poetry, it's even more of an uphill struggle. Poetry is so niche that it's difficult to get anyone to take you seriously, because the financial gain associated with the genre is so minimal. That being said, although money is what drives the writing/creative industries, it is not what drives you as a creator. Never lose the love of writing and you will always be rich. :)
www.tenyearstime.blogspot.com
Writing in general is so subjective and breaking in is about as fun as banging your head on the wall for three hours straight. A cinder block wall. With an antelope poking it's antlers up your ass (they have antlers right...well, then a moose...whatever...you know what I'm saying).
Just know that even though the people who write those lame ass movies are getting a check now, they're not winning any awards or praise...you are on the verge of all of that.
Sounds really stressful. Remember to write for you and not for all the people judging you. You seem like you have a really good outlook on it!
Girl, I know it doesn't help, but you really just have to keep writing. Behind every success story, there is a person who has failed a million times. Even with my degree in creative writing, I have yet to be published ANYWHERE so I decided to create a blog and do it myself.
You're doing the right thing and you will get there someday--I promise!
xo
Em
I once entered into a writing competition so I completely understand your frustration. The person I lost against was the worst story ever! It was about a girl who was tall, and found a tall boyfriend. OMG.
I also used to write for poetry competitions...And I "won": and had to pay for the book. Which took a year to get to me....
Amber
Ambersmouthwash
ah yes.
well i may not write scripts, but i write everything else and i can relate to this a billion times over.
i've had so much crap rejected i can't even count... and had those same pieces later published by someone.
it's retarded. and goes to show that it really just boils down to personal taste. and the other part has to do with playing upon the stupidity of the american public. ie. fast and furious 8,503
Writing is definitely a difficult career. As has been noted above, it is a subjective field, and there's no way around that fact.
The important thing is to stay focused on keeping your voice, your style, and your perspective. There is a lot of temptation in screenwriting to start tailoring one's work toward what one thinks the "mainstream" would like to see, and yet many screenwriters who try to go that route end up seeing their new screenplays getting rejected at the same rate as the old ones.
It's a crapshoot, basically. You just have to keep creating works, and eventually the stars will align -- the right person will read it, love it, and pass it on to the next-in-line who will read it and love it too, and things will finally start moving.
Keep your head up!
J
FUNCTIONALinsanity
As an actor who also gigs as a screenwritress, I totally - totally get it. If you ever want to wax industry bullshit, you should holla at me.
Don't tell, but there's something indescribably sexy about Vin Diesel. Except when he talks. So really, the suckier the screenplay, the better for Vin. Not that this comment is terribly relevant. Nor Vin Diesel. Nor legwarmers. But I just got a catalog full of them so go figure.
Also? If I had screenwriting awards to distribute I'd totally pick you. Pinky swears.
I completely understand your frustration, I get frustrated seeing commercials for Final Destination 543872986 and I'm not even a screenwriter! Keep doing what you're doing though, don't let it bring you down! :)
-Ashley
http://breakfastatsaks.blogspot.com
I understand.. it's really frustrating.. but I know it will make you better.
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