Roommates who are dirty.
Oh yeah. I mean, what's better than dishes that've been sitting in the sink for a week?! Dishes crusty with disgusting cheese shit and Tupperware so moldy it smells like baby crap that's been left in the sun for a few days? What's better than that?!
You know what else I can't live without?
Cilantro
This little herb is a HUGE pain in the ass. It ruins everything. Every single goddamn piece of food it touches. Burrito? Awesome. Until you put sprigs of Cilantro on it, rendering it inedible. Nice Italian meal? Delicious. Then you add Cilantro and it becomes poison.
You know the third thing I can't live without?
Chapstick that makes my lips even more chapped.
I mean, this is like the best product ever. Come the beginning of wintertime each year, my lips begin to get a little flaky and I think, welp, time for some lubrication! And then I make my way to the drug store or grocery store and stare at the millions of chapsticks and try to buy one that, unlike the LAST product, won't make my lips more of a mess than they already were. But guess what? It never works. Every single chapstick I try goes on smooth, but then like an asshole boyfriend, secretly fucks with things until I wake up and realize it's like the Sahara Desert over here and I have no other recourse except constantly licking my lips like a weird child molester at Disney World.
But I'm too pissed off.
(This post is a part of 20SB’s Blog Carnival: Can’t Live Without, and Alice.com is awarding prizes to lucky bloggers and readers!)
(This post is a part of 20SB’s Blog Carnival: Can’t Live Without, and Alice.com is awarding prizes to lucky bloggers and readers!)
9 comments:
I agree on the roommates and the chapstick. Both can be TERRIBLE. Cilantro though...I love the stuff, but I hear it's something you either love or hate. It's too bad you hate it so much because they sneak it into just about every Mexican dish...
"and I have no other recourse except constantly licking my lips like a weird child molester at Disney World."
Freaking golden.
And OMG I thought I was the only person who hated cilantro! I keep using it and I don't KNOW WHY.
Blistex is the only lipbalm worth your attention. The one in the little tub. I've used it for years and can't use anything else now.
Cilantro! I had to google, we call it Corriander. I'd only ever heard cilantro being used in The OC (shut up) and never knew what it was. Ha.
And I agree: Disney/child molestor comment is pure gold.
I think the idea of using spices and herbs just makes whatever dish you're making that much more interesting and exotic. Plus if you use spices then you're obviously a grown up.
I caught myself putting celery seed on chicken salad the other night, thinking that I'd create "my own recipe" that people would ooh and ahh over. Guess what? It sucked. Shoulda just stuck with mayo.
And the disney world reference is unbelievably laugh out loud funny. Wish I thought of it first!
Thankfully, the only roommate I've had (other than in a dorm without a kitchen etc.) is the one I married. He's a neat freak like I am...it works out pretty well.
I don't like Cilantro either. I used to, until I made a recipe that used so much of it that I never wanted it again.
It is Carmex for me, in the tub. Not as easy to use, but it works.
Ha! I don't like cilantro either and I know people who despise it as much as you do. I don't get the attraction to it for some.
Feel you on the chapstick thing. You should try Nivea lip balm. It seems to be a step above the rest.
I swear that lack of tolerance for cilantro is a redheaded thing. Went to a vietnamese restaurant and ordered these beautiful, transluscent spring rolls, full of, fresh -- guess what?
Yep, had to pass on it. Tasted like trash smells, like the city dump, that kind of smell, whoa.
1. aquafor. it's the only thing that will ever EVER cure your dry lips.
chapstick is a pain in my ass.
I know we don't know each other, but I ws enjoying reading your blog and I read this post and . . . Who puts cilantro in Italian food? I like cilantro, but that is just inappropriate.
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