Broccolli Me This...

Both the Huffington Post and the New York Times have recently gotten really interested in girl-on-girl action (but don’t worry, this has nothing to do with Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson. Absolutely nothing. Seriously. Nothing). They’ve gotten so interested, in fact, that they’ve dedicated whole columns to trying to figure out why it seems like chicks dig other chicks.

Let me break it down for them (and you, if you really don’t know): chicks dig chicks because we’ve been taught to dig chicks.

Why do women seem to have a more fluid sexuality than men – at least that anyone will admit? Because since we came shrieking out of the womb, we’ve seen images of women in every stage of undress – including naked. Advertisements for razors with long, leisurely shots of legs. TV shows that have a mandatory wardrobe of tight clothes and short skirts. A bajillion movies where tits and ass flash across the screen so often that we eventually forget guys even have body parts. Music videos full of bling and boob. Reality TV where hot tubs are as mandatory as microphones. Porn (who could forget porn?). I mean, it’s not an old argument that the media is saturated with the female form.

So why are we all puzzled that girls get a little aroused when they see other naked or semi-naked girls?

I’m no scientist, but if all I saw were images of broccoli strewn over the airwaves for 25 years, I’m sure I’d think pretty differently about broccoli. The media would have formed my appreciation of broccoli. Broccoli would be part of my daily life.

See what I’m getting at?

And in the same way, if tomatoes were also all over the airwaves, but not as prevalent as broccoli, I’m sure I’d be more comfortable around broccoli (in this analogy, tomatoes equal the male form). Sure, chiseled chests and naked guys are around, but brocc – I mean, the sexualized female form – is more prevalent.

Vegetables aside, it’s obvious to anyone with a brain that society tells most of us what to do and how to think, and for 25 years, I’ve been taught to equate the female form with sexuality, pleasure, and beauty.

So don’t get all surprised if my pulse runs a little quicker when I stumble across a nip slip on the internet. It doesn’t mean I’m gay.

It just means society is working.